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My eyes open. It's 5:00 in the afternoon, a perfect time for breakfast. I lumber downstairs, wondering what today has in store for me. My mommy is cooking tendies. "MOMMY" I screech. Her eyes widen and she drops the tendies. "YOU DROPPED THE TENDIES MOMMY". I roll to the kitchen and over the tendies. They stick to my muscular body. Mommy begins to cry and leaves the room. Whatever, I don't need her anyway. I stand up and shove all 20 tendies into my mouth at the same time. I walk towards the basement to check on my collection of body pillows. They all look fine except for Miku. I immediately roll to her side. "What's wrong Miku?" Miku doesn't answer. "Are you giving me the silent treatment?" Miku still doesn't answer, which makes sense because she's giving me the silent treatment. "You want me to get a job and be a decent human being?" Miku nods. What the fuck? How did a body pillow nod? I grab Miku and throw her on the ground. "ARE YOU ALIVE?" I shriek. I begin punching Miku over and over until little stains of red start to form on her face. She tenses up, then goes limp. It doesn't seem like Miku is bleeding, more as if it's something inside. I zip open the pillowcase. It's Mommy.